JUST DOING IT

Today, I took the time to do something I'd been wanting to do and meaning to do but just kept not doing.

I got out the paints and got artsy with Laura and Merry.

The prompting was the departure of Sarah Finney. She's a missionary from Ireland who'd spent the last few weeks here at We Will Go. I wanted the girls to make her going away happies and I also had things I wanted to paint, including a house warming gift past due by about three months, a birthday gift that was past due by five days, and then some paintings to raise money for Patrick's upcoming trip to Swaziland.

I had a couple of stressful incidents where Merry almost made atomic paint messes, but all in all, we had a good time. Sometimes I miss the days that I used to work at Olde Tyme Commissary and could go and paint for hours with minimal interruptions. I obviously had to take time today to make meals, run to the ATM so the teenaged boys could walk to the fair for lunch, open the door and assist and pray with neighbors who came asking for food, help a volunteer in the clothes ministry, oversee chores and schoolwork getting done, take a break for some dark chocolate, and help both Patrick and our spiritual son Desmond work on their missionary trip applications, but I still managed to complete three paintings --- two totally from scratch --- and help Merry with one for Sarah as well as start another one I'll get to at some point.

I really do love creating but all too often let either:

1. a busy mommy/missionary life keep me from doing it

or

2. a defeated perfectionist attitude that avoids doing it because I'm afraid I'll mess up and it won't be perfect.

I need to get over both of these things. I need to just take the time to do it, even if I get interrupted a lot, and I need to not worry about messing up. Its paint. I can paint over almost anything if it turns out really bad.

I get so much joy from it and I really do feel like there is an artsy, colorful, hippie mama just waiting to break out completely. I keep saying it is going to happen when I move to Africa, but maybe I need to let that girl out to breathe and dance and color and go a bit crazy even before my passport gets stamped with a Swaziland visa.